Not a Perfectionist!

“God is perfect (Matt. 5:48) but He is not a Perfectionist” someone once said.

He is a loving Father Who teaches, corrects, instructs, and disciplines His children in PERFECT LOVE!

What father is disappointed in a one year old who is learning to walk and stumbles. God is like that father. He knows our imperfections and picks us up when we fall and then encourages & teaches us to keep going and growing spiritually.

Praise the Lord for His wisdom, truth, grace, and abundant love for us, His children!

-Mark (a child of the King)

“Pre-forgive me!”

Have you ever had this attitude toward the Lord?

“Lord, please forgive me for what I am ABOUT to do?” I call it the “pre-forgive me” syndrome. People are taking lightly the consequences of sin and the grace of God which abounds so much in our lives when they have this attitude. Our counselees do this all of the time, unfortunately.

Reflect for a moment: do YOU have this type of attitude right now about some sinful area of your life (can be in your thinking, speaking, or doing)?

There is no pre-excuse for what you choose to do. God holds you responsible. Even more so, we are taking Him for granted when we make this type of decision willfully against Him. At the bottom level, we are choosing to believe the lie that sin is good rather than God’s way of righteousness is good and best for us. It is a lack of trusting in the Lord.

-Mark (glad that God does grant forgiveness for all of my sins yesterday, today, and in the future!)

Since when did the “truth” become “unloving”? (part 3)

Our culture – even our Christian culture – has believed the lie that God’s Word of truth is separate from love and nothing could be further from the truth.

While the truth might hurt us for a moment, it’s because it really hurts our pride. “Ouch, Lord, that hurts when You tell me I’m selfish and sinful.” But that’s precisely what we need – His truth in love!

Proverbs 27:5-6 says: “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”

Truth is what we need. We need our friends to speak His truth to us in the love of His Spirit every day!

So who speaks the truth to you?

To whom do you speak the truth?

-Mark (reading the truth and hearing it from true friends who really love me)

Since when did the “truth” become “unloving”? (part 2)

The TRUTH of God’s Word IS love. The Bible is NOT a dead book that is no longer relevant to us in our modern culture. In fact, I’d argue it’s more relevant and needed today than ever before!

The Bible is also powerful – alive and active!

It is a living book because the Holy Spirit uses it to TRANSFORM our thinking. Here’s what the Bible says about itself according to Hebrews 4:12: “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.“**

The Bible cuts into our hearts – our thinking and emotions and motives! The Bible’s truth is designed to hurt us for a moment like a surgeon hurts us for a moment to remove a cancerous tumor. The incision is painful but it is absolutely necessary to bring ultimate healing.

I hope you can see why His Word is SO important to the arena of counseling!

-Mark (grateful for the truth that hurts for the moment but provides real, spiritual healing)

** The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (electronic ed.) . Good News Publishers: Wheaton.

Since when did the “truth” become “unloving”? (part 1)

Wow, I need the truth. Every day. God’s truth is love. I need to know what God thinks. I need to know what God says. I need God to speak to me.

Guess what? He does speak to us through the Holy Spirit and His Word of truth.

Does the truth hurt? It may hurt our feelings and our pride but we need it to be set free.

John 8:31-32 states: “So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in him, “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”**

Abide in His Word. Read it. Study it. Memorize it. Abide in it. Live in it. Let it be your words in your conversations. Let it change you. Let it change your thinking!

Be less critical of the Bible and let it be more critical of you.

Abide in the Word of truth because when you do, the Holy Spirit abides in you more abundantly, too!

The TRUTH of God’s Word IS love.

It’s also powerful – alive and active! It is living according to Hebrews 4:12: “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.“**

I need God’s LOVING Word to change me and grow me!

** The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (electronic ed.) . Good News Publishers: Wheaton.

-Mark (longing for the day in glory when we will no longer think sinfully)

Perception is NOT always Reality

I hear people and even counselors say, “Her perception is her reality.” While that is a half-true statement, it is not wholly truthful.

People believe lies. People deceive themselves. I do it, too, sometimes! None of us are immune to falling prey to self-deception and the lies of Satan. We “think” these lies are reality though they are not. We get deceived. Just ask Eve (Gen. 3).

For this reason, we need “open rebuke” which is “better than hidden love.”

Proverbs 27: 5-6 states: “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”**

Think about this for a minute. Is this what the culture teaches us? Is this what the world tells you is good? Open rebuke is better than hidden love? Faithful are the wounds of a friend? No, the culture teaches the opposite!

The world would have you believe that anyone who disagrees with you is in error and that you need people to agree with you – encourage you, build your self-esteem, and ideas like that.

Counselees often think they are right though their lives are falling apart. Our job is to point them to the reality of Christ as THE answer to their needs and problems, including addiction, anxiety, depression, control issues, and the like. His character is revealed in the truths of the Holy Scriptures – the Bible! We need to know Him and His great love for sinners like us!

A real friend speaks the truth in love to you which is what you and I need. We need truthful friends who really love us by saying the hard things. We need biblical counselors who are knowledgeable of the Bible and point you to God’s Word under the leading of the Holy Spirit.

If we don’t have friends like that, then our perception may become our reality but it is truly NOT reality! We may miss God’s best for us if we stay in our perceived reality and never come to a knowledge of the truth.

We must pray that the Holy Spirit removes the barriers that blind us to the truth. We must pray that we would humbly receive God’s truth no matter what our fleshly pride tells us.

-Mark (learning to embrace the truth even when it “hurts” temporarily)

**The Holy Bible : English standard version. 2001 (electronic ed.) . Good News Publishers: Wheaton.

Always changing…vs. Absolute Truth

One of the joys of biblical counseling is that the Word of God never changes. It consistently applies to every situation no matter how different the circumstances. It is such a joy to have a weapon that offers my counselees hope and practical help whose truths never change.

Biblical counseling is the best “game” in town – far better than secular counseling which is always changing it’s theories. In psychology, what was accepted as “truth” 10, 20, or 30 years ago is rejected today. In fact, most psychologists do not like Freud’s stuff anymore and he is the one who is thought of the most when one thinks of psychology.

There is a LOT of debate over these theories as there is no consensus (over 300 theories exist). Imagine if there were this many theories on landing an airplane: would you ever want to fly?

Here’s a simple example of God’s wisdom in one unchanging, profound verse of Scripture. Romans 12:21 applies to every hurt experienced in every situation today because it is ABSOLUTE truth: “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

This verse is valid yesterday, today, and forever because it’s author is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He can be trusted at His Word.

-Mark (wowed by God’s wisdom on a daily basis)